Why are we making life difficult for our students?
This email was inspired by Tatiana Panchenko a Russian-based language tutor. For more information on Tatiana, visit http://MosCow.blogsource.com/
Tatiana writes; Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn (full text below) and my response;
Stephen writes; "I don't believe that English is hard to learn or any other language for that matter. I just think that there are "bad" teachers that make the learning process more difficult than it needs to be. They may do this because they are not competent to teach or they may do it deliberately in order to make more revenue from the student.
As most of your readers do not appear to be "native speakers" of English, I am sure that they are appalled by the list of "puns". It must be very depressing when faced with the list below. The only purpose of this list is to make a student feel inadequate. It reminds me of the linguistic exercises that I was required to endure during my Masters in Applied Linguistics programme. They were a complete waste of everyone's time.
My feelings about the list of "puns" are based on two principles;
I do not believe that any native speaker of English would actually "say" any of the sentences below (1-21) unless they wanted to confuse the listener deliberately which goes against all natural principles of communication. Study "real" English not some "linguistic" puzzle!
Most UK-based publishers of teaching materials now use corpus technologies to identify the most frequently-used language in certain identifiable contexts such as standard social settings such as, going to a restaurant, participating at business meetings, etc and design their resources accordingly.
The list below reminds of an age and approach to teaching which I thought was long gone. Why focus on the "exceptions" to language rules when it is far easier to focus on the regular patterns of language. It is often said that knowledge is "power" and often this "power" is abused to the students' detriment.
To conclude, "innocent" puns in English, I don't think so! These puns are "guilty" of tremendous "wrongs" against the language students of the world. End this crime against the human race now!
Now phrasal verbs such as, "goes off, lights out", that's another story for another day. However, as most communication in English now takes place between non-native speakers of the language, you can quiet happily exist without ever going down this road. By now, you probably realise that our approach here to teaching a language is based on utilitarian principles, that is, theb use of language as a means to an end rather than purely the study of language per se. By the way, the stars are always out but sometimes the clouds just get in the way!
Please continue to send me your messages as they are often amusing, sometimes irritating but always welcome.
I look forward to the thoughts of your other readers on this subject!"
Tatiana's full text;
Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.....English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France....... Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.......Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig......... And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham???????
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth??????? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese????? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend...... If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end??????
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do people recite
at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a
language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
P.S. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"?
--
Tatiana Panchenko
Tatiana writes; Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn (full text below) and my response;
Stephen writes; "I don't believe that English is hard to learn or any other language for that matter. I just think that there are "bad" teachers that make the learning process more difficult than it needs to be. They may do this because they are not competent to teach or they may do it deliberately in order to make more revenue from the student.
As most of your readers do not appear to be "native speakers" of English, I am sure that they are appalled by the list of "puns". It must be very depressing when faced with the list below. The only purpose of this list is to make a student feel inadequate. It reminds me of the linguistic exercises that I was required to endure during my Masters in Applied Linguistics programme. They were a complete waste of everyone's time.
My feelings about the list of "puns" are based on two principles;
I do not believe that any native speaker of English would actually "say" any of the sentences below (1-21) unless they wanted to confuse the listener deliberately which goes against all natural principles of communication. Study "real" English not some "linguistic" puzzle!
Most UK-based publishers of teaching materials now use corpus technologies to identify the most frequently-used language in certain identifiable contexts such as standard social settings such as, going to a restaurant, participating at business meetings, etc and design their resources accordingly.
The list below reminds of an age and approach to teaching which I thought was long gone. Why focus on the "exceptions" to language rules when it is far easier to focus on the regular patterns of language. It is often said that knowledge is "power" and often this "power" is abused to the students' detriment.
To conclude, "innocent" puns in English, I don't think so! These puns are "guilty" of tremendous "wrongs" against the language students of the world. End this crime against the human race now!
Now phrasal verbs such as, "goes off, lights out", that's another story for another day. However, as most communication in English now takes place between non-native speakers of the language, you can quiet happily exist without ever going down this road. By now, you probably realise that our approach here to teaching a language is based on utilitarian principles, that is, theb use of language as a means to an end rather than purely the study of language per se. By the way, the stars are always out but sometimes the clouds just get in the way!
Please continue to send me your messages as they are often amusing, sometimes irritating but always welcome.
I look forward to the thoughts of your other readers on this subject!"
Tatiana's full text;
Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.....English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France....... Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.......Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig......... And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham???????
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth??????? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese????? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend...... If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end??????
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do people recite
at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a
language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
P.S. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"?
--
Tatiana Panchenko
posted by Abacus Communications at 8:37 p.m.
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